I was Here.

Maybe some people might think your a downgrade or that I deserve better.

But honestly, how can they judge?  

Just because you aren’t a 6 foot, light skinned, valedictorian, with an 8 pack doesn’t mean you worth any less.  After dating those dudes I decided never to go back to guys like them, not saying they were horrible to me, it’s just that whole “Ideal Guy” image that most girls want I didn’t want anymore.  Even my friends told me how I was so hoped up on having these superior boyfriends.

But looking back, there was always a bit of insecurity constantly talking in the back of my mind, saying I wasn’t good enough to date these guys because I’m so average.  Like some Bella Swan inferiority complex.  Unintentionally they would make small blows when I know they just said it to help me like eating healthy and to work out to look a certain way, or say how they liked a girl with a certain hairstyle, or whatever.  I wanted to fit their image of perfect even if they told me I was beautiful.

After them I told myself I just wanted a “normal” guy, someone on my wavelength.  Someone who likes food and sex and laying around doing nothing.  I justed want someone equal to me, flawed and I still see them as amazing.  And I think I’ve found that and I’m actually happy and I don’t have to feel insecure about myself.  I don’t have to hide parts of me away or push myself to live a different lifestyle.  We’re compatible and it’s comfortable.  Happiness.

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